Last Moment to be Strong

There comes a time, a moment in time when we all have the choice to be strong.
We can let that moment break us or break. Either way the choice is made whether we realize it or not.
Do we wallow in our heartbreak or tell ourselves to be strong?
It's easy to be strong for me.
I'll save you the all-too-sad story of my past but we'll just say my life its made me tough. It's made me strong.
I once had the emotional range of a rock.
How do you be strong? You ask.
It's simple. You tell yourself you don't care.
You suck it up. You hold your head high.
He broke your heart and shattered it into a million pieces?
- You don't care.
He said mean and hurtful things?
- So...
These maybe harsh words but sometimes harsh words have to be spoken and they have to be heard.
But don't think life will be easy when you're strong. You're wrong. It will be harder. You'll hurt those closest to you and you'll push people away. Trust me, I know but you won't care because you'll be strong.
Being strong comes at a price. What is the price you are willing to pay? You have to ask yourself.
Because being strong means shutting down parts of your heart. It means closing the doors of feelings. It means not trusting people, family or friends. It means depending solely on yourself. It means dropping the past and never looking back.
You'll build walls so high if they were a mountain, thy would easily dwarf Mount Everest. 
When you're strong and have been for so long, its hard to open your heart again. It's going to take a miracle, a willing attitude to change and its going to take someone who loves you enough to chip away, little by little, your stony walls. Even then, that person has to be committed and consistent or else you'll toughen up threefold of what you were before. Trust me I know.

What I Miss Most

{ A few pages, a couple minutes of my time can never compare to the love I have for you, inside }

  To pick up the phone and dial your number. It's no longer in service and heaven doesn't have a phone number.
It's what I miss most about these days.
  To stop by and see your face full of surprise.
It's what I miss most about these days.
  Just to talk about the good ole days.
It's what I miss most about these days.
  Sharing stories and laughing until we cry.
It's what I miss most about these days.
  The comfort and peace you offered. All your wise advice.
It's what I miss most about these days.
  The love you have shown me. I'll forever carry in my heart.
It's what I miss most about these days.
  Smelling of Stampede after-shave and Old Spice from a warm embrace.
It's what I miss most about these days.
  Hearing the voice of a man who meant the world to me.
It's what I miss most about these days.
  A kiss on the cheek as a final farewell.
It's what I miss most about these days.
  At night, fast asleep, I dream of your face.
It's what I miss most about these days.
  Though its been months and I cannot cry. Instead I hide my pain.
It's what I miss most about these days.
  You carried my only regret and I cannot turn back time.
It's what I miss most about these days.
  I'm glad for all our time spent together but...
It's what I miss most about these days.
  You are what I miss most about these days but I know you're in a better place.
It's what I miss most about these days.

Road Rash

Have you ever felt like your heart has road rash? Based against the pavement at 200 miles per hour without a helmet; peeling away layer by layer; penetrating to your core. Leaving it rough, tender, sore, dripping in blood. Yeah I know.

Then there comes a time, just a moment in time; it violently tears at the scab. Displaying it from the fleshy heart. A second is all it takes, to ruin the work of healing. You lay open and exposed again, with no scab to protect the wound. Making you start all over again. Yeah I know.

And Where do We Find Ourselves?

And where do we find ourselves?
Through the hurt
Through the anger
Through the pain
How do we find ourselves again, after a rain?
Through the fog
Through the mist
Through the dampness
How do we claim ourselves again?
Through the tears
Through the heartbreak
Through the sorrow
How do we regain ourselves again?
Through the sleepless nights
Through the meaningless lies
Through the façade and fake smiles
How do we become ourselves again?
Through the struggles
Through the empty feelings
Through the reminders of what was lost
Lost like the little piece of your heart
Gone forever in an abyss
Never to return
Leaving you forever broken
Forever scarred, to always wear it upon your heart.